How To Know You've Truly Healed From A Break Up.
You are not bitter.
It's hard to go through a breakup and not have feelings of anger or disappointment. We throw ourselves into someone, give them so much, and usually don't see things ending. When they do, it's hard not to hold a grudge. But we can't stay stuck in the past. We can't be jealous when they move on. We have to acknowledge the good things that happened during the relationship, and move on.
You are not rebounding.
A healed person is fine standing on their own. The best way to get over someone, isn't to get under someone else. You have to be ok with being on your own. It's not fair to drag someone else into your life just beacuse you don't want to be alone. That's not fair to the other person. Your feelings are not the only ones that matter.
You have a balanced perspective.
When you've healed, the tunnel vision goes away. You stop seeing things they way your damaged mind wants you to see them. You can see things for what they are because you have a balanced insight on matters.
You can own your own.
You have to be able to accept that you aren't perfect. You have to own up to the mistakes you've made in the relationship. Not only own up to them, but learn from them and not repeat them in the future.
They’re not able to "double dutch" in your life.
It ended. It's normal to want things to work out, and the two of you get back together. Maybe things will work out, maybe they won't. But you can't let someone continuously bounce in and out of your life. It isn't healthy.
You clearly see where you've grown.
Feeling yourself overcoming your mistakes and learning from them is an amazing feeling! Knowing the same mistakes won’t be made again in the future, is an even better feeling!
You are able to wish them well.
There is something therapeutic about wanting happiness for someone who hurt you so badly. Good people make bad choices, I am a firm believer in that. We all say and do stupid things. One moment in time does not define someone. Let the grudge go, wish them the best, and let go of all the bad juju.
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